Father’s Day: All you need is love

Ever since we can remember, the holiday has taken a back seat to its more celebrated counterpart for females…but in case you’ve forgotten, this Sunday is Father’s Day. And while real Dads in Belize often seem like an endangered species, News 5’s Jacqueline Woods discovered that when it comes to parenting…all you need is love.

Jacqueline Woods, Reporting

I can tell you, raising two children on my own is no easy task. It’s a challenge that thousands of other single mothers also face. Two years ago The Central Statistical Unit surveyed fifty-two thousand households. The census revealed that over twelve thousand homes headed by single mothers. Unfortunately, the count did not include how many families are headed by fathers only.

Although it is the responsibility of both parents to take care of their children, the reality is that many youngsters are being raised by only one. But does it make a difference whether a child is raised by one parent or two?

Woman #1

“Well, a father is needed in the home to support a family and love his kids and family.”

Woman #2

“I think we can make it on our own. We make it very good…I work, she works.”

Man #1

“Both of them, because when your children are being raised they want love. You got show them love because if you do not show them that you care for them, they think–we might not see them think but they think–and they realise that why my mommy, daddy are treating me this way.”

Man #2

“You suppose to have a mother and a father. Kids mostly need their mothers by their side, plus their fathers. But I say it’s better that they have their mother and father together because the kids will grow up straighter than if they grow up with only their father or mother. They will be missing something out of their lives and they won’t grow up straight.”

But thousands of parents choose not to be responsible. It’s a problem the Belize Family Court addresses daily.

Richard Stuart, Magistrate, Belize Family Court

“People come to Family Court basically because they need help, because perhaps they are applying for maintenance for a child, whose father does not want to maintain him or her. So you find they come to the Family Court to get a protection order because of the domestic violence situation where the father is abusing the spouse.”

Richard Stuart is a Magistrate at the Belize Family Court. Stuart, who was not raised by either of his parents, admits that while children would like to live with both parents, he does not believe children suffer if they have to get by with less.

Richard Stuart

“Because I have seen cases where single mothers have raised children and they have turned up to be excellent. In my case, I was raised by my grandparents, and I don’t think I turned out too badly.”

Barbara Ferguson is a single mother of a teenaged daughter. Five days a week she vends in front of Wesley Primary School to make money to take care of her child.

Jacqueline Woods

“How difficult is that job?”

Barbara Ferguson, Single Mother

“Difficult, very difficult because I have to try do everything.”

However, the sacrifices do have rewards. Although not all cases are success stories, there are single parents who have made a positive difference in their children’s lives. Nineteen-year-old Rhondeen Pitts and twenty-one year old Melanie Burgess are two friends who share one thing in common…both young women are from single homes.

Rhondeen Pitts, 19 years old

“In some ways I think it would have been nice to have a father figure, especially for a young lady where she has to deal with the male gender and everything, to have that father figure to show you what a man should be like for you. I would have probably helped me to understand what guys are and how to deal with them better.”

Melanie Burgess, 21 years old

“Well growing up in a single parent home, it wasn’t all that hard, but it wasn’t easy. Because I knew my dad, but basically my mom was the backbone of my family. She was there for us through everything, my brothers and I. It was okay, but it was difficult at times. You wanted stuff but you had to wait to get it, it wasn’t always there.”

Rhondeen Pitts

“I think it gives you a better understanding of assuming responsibility, watching one parent fight from both ends trying to handle both roles. It makes you learn that you can’t live under that stereotype that okay I am supposed to be a mom, I’m supposed to cook, I supposed to clean, or I’m a dad, I have to go out and make the money, it’s best to share responsibility.”

In 1999, thirty-four year old Charles was granted custody of his three daughters. On the day we met Moss, he was at school picking up both of his children.

Charles Moss, Single father

“When God design human beings, he designed male and female and He wanted that both of them raise children. But in my case it’s me one, but I have my mom who helps me a whole lot with them, so I noh find it that hard.”

However, nothing can replace the love of a parent. Moss’s children know just how much their dad cares for them and their little embraces tell him how much he is appreciated.

Father Leroy Flowers, St. Mary’s Church

“Let me say from the onset. Yes, mothers have done and continue to do a wonderful job in many, many homes, but mother’s cannot be fathers. They cannot play the role of the father no matter what because that was not God’s intention. So there’s a part of that child-and even though we all profess to a very large degree it wasn’t important-there’s a part of that child that is never filled if daddy is not there.”

To commemorate Father’s Day, The Belize City Council held a special mass for staff and employees at St. Mary’s Church. Father Leroy Flowers conducted the service, which focused on fatherhood.

Father Leroy Flowers

“One of the important things is to be consistent in the life of your child, to be there for him, give him or her the sense of appreciation and acceptance and stability. And so what I did in my message this morning, was to challenge the fathers who have varied situations, that no matter what, at the end of the day they need to be there for their children.”

Whatever the circumstances that caused the family circle to be broken, both parents should never forget that their children still need all the love and care they can give. Jacqueline Woods For News 5.

Happy Father’s Day.